Chasing Our Tails..

Yes, we have been chasing our tails. It has been appointment after appointment. We want our girls to get what they need, so we are doing our best to get them there and get things started.



Phoebe is going to school!! Next Tuesday she will start in transition classes. I'm not sure if I've posted that Phoebe brought home an intestinal bug with her. She has been treated for that. Phoebe has seen the cardiologist, endocrinologist, international clinic, Ds clinic, and therapists. Her heart is clear. Her thyroid not so much. We will start her on thyroid meds today. She has been fitted for "Chipmunks" and will have to wear those shoe inserts. We have appointments for the eye doctor coming up. Phoebe's behaviors are getting better, some days are better then some. She definitely is one tough cookie. Phoebe likes to eat pretty much anything, except for spaghetti. Really? I guess Italian food is out for this one. We cannot get her into the dentist until fall. Her teeth look pretty good though. Phoebe loves attention. Her favorite toys are Elmo and Magna Doodles. She loves Apple Juice and Kefir to drink.









Bella is being evaluated for preschool. She should start soon. Bella also brought home an intestinal bug with a second one to boot. She is currently being treated with three different meds for that. Bella has seen cardiology, international adoption clinic, Ds clinic, therapists, and had a video swallow study done. Her heart and endocrine are clear. She flunked her video. She is aspirating on thin liquids, so everything has to be thickened to nectar. Bella will be fitted for "Sure Steps" and will go to physical therapy in the next couple weeks. She walks on the inside of her feet and her ankles turn in. She has an eye doctor appointment coming up and a visit with OT for feeding issues. She still is not chewing. Bella loves food and will eat anything that we can feed her, but it seems like Mac and Cheese and Kefir are her favorites. We can't get Bella into the dentist until fall either. Her teeth seem to be doing well. Bella seems to love trucks and cars the most. She doesn't play with certain toys. She is much happier being right beside us and/or walking around holding onto her walking toys.




I will do my best to keep everyone in the loop. Many more appointments to come...and for the first time ever...SCHOOL!!!!!

Life Goes On...

I know it has been awhile since we have updated, but we seem to be kind of busy. I feel like I owe people updates on the girls. As you can see here they are getting along better day by day. They often imitate each other. They act like they have been together for a long time. The love each other and they fight with each other. Just like sisters :)





Bella is changing day by day. She is TAKING STEPS!! Only 1-3 steps at a time, but it is a move forward. She is weighing in at 23 pounds and is 33 inches tall. She has this thing where she starts this long lecture if Phoebe throws clothes on the floor. Bella is quite the character.





Phoebe is weighing in at 29 pounds and is 35 inches long. Phoebe eats anything. This girl can hold her own. Phoebe is strong. She has mastered the sippee cup. Phoebe likes to carry a certain toy or paper around with her all day long. We went to the Endocrine clinic and Phoebe's labs came back normal. The girls were cleared by Cardiology and don't have to go back. They went to the International Adoption Clinic and had a bunch of blood work drawn. We also had to gather multiple stool samples to check for any type of abnormality. We should know within the next few days if anything shows up. As soon as we find anything out, we will let all of you know :)

Abandoned

Have you ever drove past a house and thought it was so beautiful? Then for some reason this house becomes abandoned. Who knows why, but nobody ever moves back in. As the years go by, time slips away, and the house falls apart. The windows crack. The paint chips. The bricks crumble. The foundation slips away. Time without love and someone living inside the heart of the home often makes it fall apart. The same thing happens to our kids.




I would like to introduce you to this little girl. Well, she's not little. She is SIXTEEN. Yes, she is sixteen years old. She will be turning seventeen in August. Then her chance for adoption will be over. She will live her life, or what is left of it in an institution. I am not here to judge any culture or any person. I am not pointing fingers. That is not the point. I could scream and yell and tell this person or that person that what they are doing is wrong. Maybe it would change in time, so our kids could have the life they deserve, but our kids don't have time. They need us. Me. You. The next person. There has been a lot of negativity with horrible troll comments dragging families and and their future adopted children through the ground. Fighting among Ds families. People pointing fingers at Reece's Rainbow. Rumors. Lies. Maybe some truth. While all of this is happening, this girl is waiting. She is waiting when she should be home getting ready for her prom. So, if you don't like Reece's Rainbow, for a personal reason or because of what you have been told, then that is your choice. I am a supporter of Reece's Rainbow and I always will be. Instead of fighting about this though with me, or anyone else, move forward. If there is a child you want to adopt and you don't like this organization...please by all means find another one to help you. Find another agency to work with you. It is not about any certain agency or non profit, it is about our children. It is about children here in our country and all over the world. We have got to stop fighting. We have to stop defending ourselves against trolls who thrive on pain they like to inflict, because for every blasted moment we spend on them, we are losing precious time. These children are losing precious time.

If it is about picking others apart. Remember there is still sin, but we still have faith. There is crime, but we still have trust. There is divorce, but there still is marriage. There is death, but we still live. There is darkness, but there still is light. There is grief, but we still have happiness. There is hate, but we still have love. Please remember this little girl in your prayers. Remember every single child in every single country that needs a family. No orphanage, no matter how nice it is, is ever going to take the place of a family that will love them as part of their family. I see the change every day in my girls faces. My heart aches for the ones I left behind. If you are not in the position to adopt, please pray for the children left behind. If you feel inclined to donate, please visit www.reecesrainbow.org and you can pick a child or family in process. If you are in a position to adopt, please feel free to seek Reece's Rainbow's help. If you do not want help from us, then seek an agency that can help you. Please, just remember the bottom line. Our children. Get to them whatever way you can.

Our Road

In 2003 we went to a foster parent conference, and there we met Robin Steele from the DSAGC. Little did we know that on that day, our lives would be changed. Although I already had an Aunt with Down syndrome it had not even crossed my mind about adopting a child with Down syndrome. Not that I wouldn't, but I guess I didn't know that programs existed. We were already home study approved and were thinking about adoption. After we met her and her children...took her class about Down syndrome...I looked at my husband and told him I thought this was something we could do. We filled out the application and then about four months later A came to live with us.

A was in foster care. His birth mother had given birth to him in the hospital and left him there. She was mentally ill and unable to care for him. There were things in our minds that we didn't think we could handle. If they had told us the things little A had endured while she was pregnant, we probably would have said no. They placed A into my arms. My husband and I looked at him and we knew he was ours. Then they told us all the stuff he had been through...no prenatal care...abuse during pregnancy...open heart at three months...coding after birth...sleep apnea...g tube...tube feeding...breathing treatments...severe cardiac defect...it all sounded daunting. Looking into those beautiful blue eyes made those things seem less of a burden and more of a challenge. Something we could learn and overcome with him. Not that it was something we had to overcome, but something we had to fight along side of him with. This boy needed us. He needed parents. We were it.

Now, the last nine years have not been a piece of cake. There have been some rough times. A lot of sleepless nights. A lot of surgeries. A lot of therapies. A lot of chasing after him when he runs from you in a crowded place. A lot of fights with people that have no clue what they are talking about. A lot of ignorance. Did I say A LOT OF IGNORANCE??? A lot of diapers. A lot of meds. A lot of fighting for him. With all that and more, there were also very good times. There are still very good times. You see, when we adopted him we made him a part of our family. For us, there was no giving up. A is my boy. He will always be my baby. If anyone knows me, they know that. He loves his Dad. He loves his sisters and his brothers. He is just as much a part of me as my birth children. We are realistic and know that his behaviors and issues will be a life long process for him. He will never get rid of them, but we will stand beside him every single day and help him fight. We will help him make his life the best it can be. We will help A have a great quality of life. He will get everything he needs. A has many people that love him. He has his family and his school. His teachers at Starlight and his therapists who fight for him and what he needs. We love A. I couldn't imagine my life without him.

In 2005 we were chosen to be parents of E. I had talked to his birth mother several times through email and was to be in Massachusetts for his birth. This was a wonderful experience. She loved him very much. She still does. We keep in touch so she can see him grow. When E was born he had a severe cardiac defect. A few hours after his birth his oxygen sats dropped and he started turning blue. After they stabilized him he was taken to UMASS Memorial where he spent eleven days. We spent the rest of four weeks at a local hotel until ICPC could be done. At six months E had open heart surgery. Poor kiddo hadn't gained any weight for three months because of his heart. Then at almost two years of age E coded on my husbands lap in the ER. He was life flighted to NWCH and spent four weeks there. E had his second open heart surgery where he had a pacemaker and defibrillator placed. E has been through a lot, but even though we worry every single day about his heart...we wouldn't trade any day he is with us. Other then his heart, E has no other serious medical conditions. E runs, jumps and plays like any other child. He is in school and is learning. E can count, says his ABC's, sings like there is no tomorrow and can recite the pledge. We know that as E grows, he has many more surgeries in his future. E carries so much love with him. Anyone that knows him loves him. It's hard not to.

If you have been to our blog before, you have read about our Carmen. I miss that little girl so much. Losing your daughter is hard. She never got to see the sun or the moon. Now, Carmen dances with the angels. No tubes, no scars...a perfect little heart.




Then there are our two little girls. We love them very much. We know our road has just started with them, but we feel the road we have been on has helped prepare us for this. It has brought to us the tools we need to give our girls the life they deserve. Once again, we know this road may have bumps, but we are ready. The appointments and therapies are beginning. Just to let everyone know, Phoebe's labs have came back normal for her thyroid. We are not sure why they were abnormal the first time. She is playing and interacting with her brothers. Miss Phoebe is a very present personality. She lets everyone know she is there :) Bella is growing leaps and bounds. She is a quiet girl, but is learning her voice. Bella is wrapping people around her tiny little finger. Yes, she still has her sassy looks :)





For anyone that wonders, these girls are not going anywhere. There are no plans or even fleeting thoughts that they will go anywhere. They are a part of our family. For good times and bad, they are our daughters. We brought them into our family. They are here forever.

Doctors Visits and Such

The girls have been doing well. I am sorry about not updating much. Facebook is so much easier for me. It's just point and click then post. We have applied for Social Security cards. The girls have seen the pediatrician and had blood work. Phoebe has hypothyroidism and just saw the Endocrinologist today. We will know by the end of the week what dose she should be on. Bella and Phoebe have appointments with the International Adoption Clinic, Down syndrome Clinic, Cardiologist and have been caught up on their shots. I am working on getting the paper work ready to register them for the Russian Consulate.

Phoebe is eating well and it seems like her bowel issue is under control. Her institutional behaviors are getting better as the days go by. Did I mention she gives the best hugs? Bella is eating well, but still cannot chew. We talked to our EI specialist Eileen today about things we could do to help that. Bella has changed a great deal from a little girl who just laid around to a little girl who is finding her voice. She also crawls all over the place.

I hope you enjoy the pics. They are wonderful. There are bumps along the road, but I feel almost guilty about how they just fit. I love all of you and thanks for everything. I will never forget what you have done for us.

Just A Little Update

It has been a little busy since we got home. Sorry about not updating, but I have been trying to think about what to say. This has been a long hard road. We fought the fight many times with loss, hardship and criticism from many avenues. Without the support of my friends, certain family members and my Reece's Rainbow Family...I don't think we would have ever made it. It definitely is a God thing. He gets a great deal of credit for this from me. I also feel like it was a lot easier...no that's not a good word for this...it was not as hard as I thought it was going to be.

Court was scary. I mean really scary. Trying to prove how much you love two children to people who don't know you is hard. I wasn't sure what the outcome was going to be, but after seeing people from the DOE and the orphanages having tears in their eyes, I left that court room with a different feeling. It was God...my guardian angels...somebody was there to guide me. You can choose to believe that or not, it doesn't really matter if you believe me. I am just telling you how it felt. This region was strict. You had to follow the guidelines, but they were fair. Our Marina's are amazing. They know what they are doing and they prepare you like you should be prepared. Our agency HAPS and Kathy were amazing. The support and guidance was fantastic. I call Kathy my Mom.


Another thing that I was prepared for was the people of their country not supporting me or liking us...well it really isn't like that. I mean, we did encounter people who weren't very nice, but I get that here too. The culture is different, yes. The people act different, yes. The food is different, yes. Really though, I feel kind of guilty. It was hard being away from my family for almost four weeks (I hated being away from them,) but it was necessary to bring our girls home. I feel guilty because it wasn't as bad or as hard as some regions have had it. The team there, like I said was wonderful. Our drivers were kind. The staff at the Peking Hotel was wonderful to us and the girls. Our land lord Irina, was fantastic. When Matthew was gone, she took me to the theater and to the ski slopes for exercise. Included in the apartment was two trips to the grocery (she takes you for free and you pay for the groceries.) I drove in the car with her and her husband to the theater. He is a well known surgeon is their country. To me, that was privilege. We also met a wonderful woman by the name of Melody and her husband Paul. They have the cutest children. They prayed with us and invited me over for dinner. She even helped me get new hats for the girls when the orphanage director got upset with us because she said the hats were not warm enough. We had them over the night before we left and ordered pizza. Then I met Catherine and Karen, who took me to church while I was there. It was very helpful. On the last day in their country we took them to Hard Rock Cafe. I had only ate out really twice since being there, so we wanted to take the girls somewhere to celebrate. It was really fun for all of us. The girls loved the waitresses. They talked to them in their native language. Phoebe tried Macaroni and Cheese for the first time and Bella played with HER balloon.

Transition with the girls has been a little on the harder side. Now, I will say for the ones who will jump on that statement and have a field day...it's not what you think. It has been hard to see Phoebe cry in her sleep. It is hard when they get upset and cry. Bella is so tiny and she cannot chew and she has to eat pureed foods at 3. They both grind their teeth. Phoebe is showing a lot of institutional behaviors. You have to understand that they are in a whole different time zone and a whole different routine. It is getting better. It is going to be a long road, but one we have been prepared to handle. We are not new to these type of issues. It can be done. It will be done. We will do what we need to do to help them. We have only been home two days. Our family is already falling in love with them.

I will try to keep you updated between work and getting the kids settled in. My oldest daughter is preparing for college. So, between getting all the kids to their appointments and our oldest ready for college, we will be pretty busy. We just want to thank all of you from the bottom of our hearts. Without you, this never would have happened. We love you all for that!!

God Bless,
Lisa

Going To Church

The first visit here to our girls city, we met a couple who were from Canada/Australia. They help teach the Bible here in the country. Very nice family with two beautiful children. The wife, Melody, told me about a couple of women who work for the Madonna House. They both are Catholic. Melody and I met up with Catherine and had tea. Then Catherine and I went to church. The church was consecrated Catholic, but during a certain time in history, it was taken away from the Catholic Church. There was a piano built on the altar. They changed the windows from the religious symbols and now use it as a concert hall. The Catholic Church rents the building out to hold service there. I felt extremely privileged to be able to attend church here today. Although the whole service was in Russian, I didn't feel the need to follow along in the English version of the service. I just really felt like I needed to watch the Priest. It was educational and just where I needed to be today. Receiving communion was a true blessing. God puts people in places sometimes for us. I thank God for letting me do this today.