We committed to Yana back in February. It has been six months since then. There have been so many roadblocks. First, there was an agency issue. Her region only allows 35 referrals per agency per year. Once that was resolved, our homestudy took awhile to get done. Once we received it, there were errors. We were able to apply for our I600A and have been approved, but not without that dreaded pink letter. When we went to have our first set of documents for our first trip apostilled, our documents were notarized here in our city and we didn't realize they had to be certified. So, we had to have them re-notarized, certified, and then apostilled. All,snafu's, but able to be fixed.
Money has always been an issue for us. We knew about five years ago that things would get tight when we decided to have one of us stay home to take care of our children. Our boys had some health issues that needed a stay at home parent, plus, we just didn't trust anyone with them. Our Anthony cannot talk. The thought of someone doing something to him made me just sick. It makes me sick to think of anyone doing anything to any of my kids, but Anthony could never tell us if they did. So, I work full time and my husband stays at home with our babies. Plus, this year we have had some not so great things happen. Gabby got in an accident with a semi in January. We are still battling them to pay the bills (yes it was the semi's fault.) Our basement flooded. Our fridge died. Our air conditioner went out of our truck...etc.
When we committed to Yana, I knew money would be an issue, but not once have I doubted that God would provide for us and for her. I stepped out in full faith. I told my husband just to be her Dad and I would worry about the money. We have had two yardsales and raised a decent amount of money. Most of it has went to help pay for the beginning stuff. Today I ordered our visas for travel. Yes, we have been able to pay some things by ourselves, but not a great deal of it. I mean, a few dollars here and a few hundred there, but not thousands.
Today while talking to Andrea, she made that harsh reality real. She told me that we couldn't make Yana wait forever. I know this and she is right. At that moment though, I could feel my heart in my throat and I was scared. The thought of losing her made me ill. Afterall, I know God knows how much this child means to us. He knows my heart and the tears I cry all the time for her. A few weeks ago, I applied for Show Hope and then The Abba Fund and Lifesong. All I can do is pray that they come through. I don't want to lose her, but I can't expect her to wait forever. Harsh realities stink. I am going to do my best to think of some other ways to fundraise while we wait on answers from them. We still have some fundraisers on this blog.
If you know my family you know that we have lost our Carmen two years ago after open heart surgery. I am not ready to lose a child again. Yana is ours in my heart and mind. All I can say is that right now I am at my weakest. My heart and soul is open to God and his works. I give myself to him. I am begging our God to show me the way. I firmly believe that he showed us this angel for a reason. She is meant for us...Please God-I need you now.
I think it's totally wrong that Andrea makes you feel that you are keeping Yana waiting when it's only been 6 months since you first committed to her. There are other families who have been in-process for over A YEAR ~ one who has been working for 17 months and one longer than that ~ so why are THEY not being told THEIR children can't "wait forever"?
ReplyDeleteYou're not making Yana wait forever. The process of adopting from EE typically takes up to 9 months, so you are NOT beyond the NORMAL timeframe for adopting from that country.
Don't give up. God will make a way. Don't give her up. If someone wants to try and force you to, I think you should insist on being allowed the same amount of time that other families are being given. It's not right that you would be forced to give up your child after 6 months when others are allowed to continue pursuing their child after 17+ months.
Also, if you were not committed to Yana, who WOULD be? She could sit there on the RR website with no one committing to her, and by forcing you to give her up, you'd lose the $1275 spent committing to her!
Nope... don't give up. I'm standing with you in prayerful agreement that the God of Heaven will provide in HIS time.
((((HUGS))))
Keep your head up... God has this. God will provide. I know it. You will have a testimony of provision in the end. You just have to believe that.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry. I will pray for you and your little yana!
ReplyDeleteGOd bless you!
My heart goes out to you! I know how much you want to get to your precious Yana. I hope your grants come through--how much are you still needing for your first trip?
ReplyDeleteOh Lisa, this was so hard to read. You aren't making Yana wait. You are doing all you can to get to her as fast as you can.
ReplyDeleteHello, I am new to your blog. Yana was on the site when we adopted our 3 babies from the Ukraine. So, Yana is very special to me. We had thought of adopting her at one time. I am very sad to read your blog today. We were once where you are right now and a lot of people stepped forward to help out. My husband wants me to ask you how much you still need for your adoption. We wanted to send a mass email out to a lot of people from our church and in our bible group and our friends. They all know our passion for orphans and know that this is our calling in life. Please let us know how much you own so we can get the email out and I will send an email with a link to your blog and we will all prat together that you start seeing God at work through all of this. Do not give up, Keep your head held high. By the way, Andrea had made this call to us once as well. She does try to scare you into being faster for the babies. I know she does'nt want the babies to stay there for along time, but she needs to understand that we can not all just come up with the money all at once. God will provide!!! Please email me back with the info. The Beasleys tbarch@prodigy.net Our phone number in case you want it is 830-714-4800. Thanks
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your support. It is hard to be at this point. I am trying to think of other ideas and I am going to apply for more grants. I am leaving it up to God. He knows how much I love her. She just has to be part of our family. I emailed you. Tell everyone thank you for praying. I don't blame Andrea-I know she has the best interest of the babies in mind.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sandra. I love you so much and your support means the world to me!!
ReplyDeleteLisa-we were down to about 2300 but the money I got for cashing in on my 403b, we had to use some of it to pay hospital bills incurred related to a wreck my daughter was in where she was hit by a semi. There was a snafu related to insurance payments and we had to pay it so they didn't turn us in. It's hard to tell how long it will be until we get it back. So, we are back to about 4k.
ReplyDeleteKate-thank you so much! I don't blame Andrea..she is looking after Yana, I know that. I am not giving up on her until someone tells me I have no choice. I am just praying that these grants and loans come through...they would be the answer to our prayers. I know that God is my savior. I have given this to him. I just want him to show me the way and lead into the direction for further ideas. Fact of the matter is, I know many people would love to have her. I mean, who wouldn't?? I know and have faith that God will save us all. My whole family and that includes our Yana!
ReplyDeleteI too am very frustrated at this point so I feel for you. I wish there was an easier way to do all of this! We just have to keep trying. Good luck with your grant apps!
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